the red vineyard

confidence, the ability to take criticism....

~two things i personally struggle with & am sure some of you may, too.

some of use...probably MANY of us humans have this detrimental way of thinking. this misconception that life should just be a piece of cake. whenever things don't go our way we may even whine or complain like a child. because everything should be so easy, right? 

well, we can't have the sweet without the sour dearies, and i have to remind MYSELF of this often! if only i could remember to remind myself often... ((ha)). 

i decided to post about this today because of something i experienced recently and how i strongly feel the world needs a bit of a encouragement on a daily. ;-)

yesterday, i participated in a local wine & art event. it was the first time i ever really displayed my art and actually had to stay to watch/interact w/ people viewing my art. honestly, it kinda terrified me. i have social anxiety at times and talking to strangers isn't always my strong point. not only that, but i am also my own worst critic when it comes to pretty much everything! 100 people can tell me they LOVE my stuff but then that one lil ole' lady scoots along and somewhat criticizes it AND.... my heart is sinking :( 

so yesterday i had quite a few older peoples checking out my art. i guess i never really thought about how my art may not be catered to such peoples. i mean, many of them were nice & polite but i could totally tell some of them were perplexed with my style. lol. THEN this one dear ole' lady came up to me EXTREMELY enthusiastically & said "WOW, your art is DIFFERENT!!". lol. & i swear i did NOT know how to respond to that. i mean it seemed like somewhat of an insult but she said it so excitingly. i kept thinking after she left, "what did she mean by that?!"  

all & all everything worked out well & i even sold 5 paintings, yessss! :D but STILL after i came home i was thinking of that dang ole' lady & her response. i actually told my son Jayden about it and explained how it kinda bummed me out. Jayden says, "don't worry mom, don't you know that Van Gogh only sold one painting while he was alive?" && i was like "by golly, no, i did not!" (( jayden always has a way of cheering me up when i'm down )) after he told me that i was instantly intriged in the Van Gogh story and googled up some info on it. 

Van Gogh was seriously mentally ill, most of us know of the chopping off of the ear, (though i read it was only PARTIAL ear), but STILL, so sad. apparently he had painted over 900 paintings and only sold one (the red vineyard) for 400 francs a couple months before he committed suicide. 

The Red Vineyard

nowadays most everyone knows the name,"Vincent Van Gogh" and can at least identify with a couple of his most famous paintings. paintings that have sold for MILLIONS in more recent years! it's hard to believe that he was so unrecognized in his own day & age. 

i guess that is part of being an artist. it's part of putting yourself out there. there will always be people that may not agree, or appreciate what you do. but if it's what makes YOU happy, then so be it :) art is expressing yourself, it's a creative outlet, it's freeing your mind! and this can also tie into any hobbies or forms of self expression you may love. kinda like the whole Michael Jordan didn't make is first basketball try-outs deal, it seems so unbelievable! there is much to say about a person who has a ton of will-power and determination. it's seems like it makes anything possible, if we only truly believed in ourselves. 

using Van Gogh as an example on how to lead a happy & fulfilling life may be a little odd, (lol) but i'm sure you get what i mean, about the actual VALUE & appreciation of art. when Jayden told me about the Van Gogh painting it just kinda shook me. it was like God telling me, "Julie, who gives a rat's ass about that lil ole' lady at the wine & art show?!" & so to Jayden & God i say thank you..i really needed that :)

& maybe some of you may need this blog entry. 

Rock on with your bad selves ;-)

*Peace & blessin's*

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